The Most Pretentious Menu I’ve Seen Yet

Menu from a conference dinner (the venue has a maritime / naval warfare historical connection, which may explain some of the more florid bits)
 
Warm Mousseline of Sussex Chicken stuffed with Cave Matured Roquefort and Fresh Harvested Walnuts with a Sauce of Sorrel Hollandaise and Julienne of Russet Apples
 
A Ravioli in the Colours of the Kingdom of Naples filled with Scottish Lobster, Salmon and Ginger from the Windward Islands and topped with Deep Fried Leeks
 
Cannon of English Lamb stuffed with Wild Woodland Mushrooms and Truffles, imprisoned in a pastry cage with a Sauce of Wild Rowan Berries and a Plume of French Bar-le-Duc
Black Potatoes from the Ardennes
Bundles of Vegetables gathered fresh from the garden
 
A Miniature Gateau flavoured with Liquorice from the Spanish Maine concealing a heart of liquid fire glazed with Quince Jelly and served on Lapsang Creme Anglaise with Baby Pear finished with an arabesque of purest gold.
 
Glazed Normandy Brie with Wild Mulberries and Bath Oliver Biscuits
 
Coffee and Homemade Truffles
 
I had to look up Bar-Le-Duc, it's a French preserve named after a town in Lorraine, traditionally made with whole redcurrants which have had the seeds extracted by little old ladies using a goose quill. I would normally spell Spanish Main without the "e", but otherwise there were no spelling mistakes – too many capitals but consistently used. On the whole though – YUCK – over complicated, and generally a right mess. Apparently the dessert was a sponge with something like a malteser in the middle, which in turn had a brandy liqueur centre. It wasn't popular. And the Brie was glazed with a sugar topping, so two desserts.
 
One idea worth playing with might be the Lapsang custard with a poached pear, that could be an interesting combo. 

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Tea-marinated salmon with pak choi

From Waitrose free quarterly seasonal food magazine, Winter 2005. Edited to serve 2. Again, the kind of food we're eating a lot of now.
 

331cals per, not allowing for any rice / noodles.

  • 1 Waitrose Assam tea bags
  • 2.5cm piece fresh root ginger, grated
  • 0.5 clove garlic, crushed
  • 2 tbsp sweet soy sauce
  • 0.5 tbsp clear honey
  • 2 fresh salmon fillets
  • 1 tbsp toasted sesame oil
  • 1 tbsp olive oil
  • 200g pack green pak choi, halved lengthways

Make tea with 100 ml boiling water, sit for 5 minutes. Add ginger, garlic, soy sauce and honey and leave to cool.

Marinate salmon in mixture at least 4 hours, preferably overnight.

Remove the salmon from the marinade and pat dry with kitchen paper. Reserve the marinade. Heat the sesame oil with half the olive oil and add the salmon, skin-side down. Leave for 2-3 minutes then turn and cook for a further 3 minutes. Remove the salmon and place on a dish. Cover – it will finish cooking in its own steam while you cook the pak choi.

Add the remaining olive oil to the pan with the pak choi. Stir fry over a high heat until wilting, then pour in half the reserved marinade. Boil and leave it to bubble for 3-4 minutes until most of the liquid has evaporated and the pak choi is tender. Serve immediately with the salmon.

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